EVERY WRINKLE TELLS A TALE

Rama Tai

⁠⁠⁠⁠Well, if we ask anyone to imagine about an old age home he/she will definitely think about a poorly constructed building where some sad old people are living, but when you see Rama Tai your thoughts about the old age homes will surely change.

 An old woman in her 80’s with a smile on her face and joy in her heart greeted us with a great spirit. She moved to this nursing care in 2006 with her husband. Unfortunately, just after one year, her husband expired due to some kind of disease. But even after 10 years since the demise of her husband she smiles just like a 5-year-old. 

When we asked for her view on this generation's behavior towards the senior citizens she said, “It is your loss when you misbehave with us, because you will never have the privilege of knowing the experiences that we have with us. We will be happy where ever we live even if that is at an old age home. Yes, we may get sad at times but it will go away eventually!” 

The energy of Rama Tai was even more than us. She also cross-questioned us and which we barely survived. She told us about her daily routine, her hobbies, and her favorite TV shows. Well, we surely need people like Rama Tai in our lives to cheer us up when needed and teach us the value of self-independence. 

Lata Chopra

"You are probably figuring out what life is and what is it going to be like. Let me tell you that it looks exactly like an Indian road. You have to always be ready for a pothole and there will never be a guarantee for a perfect road, but always hope that you will find your sea link". 

You've always heard these cliches, but now we are showing you a real life example.

How many 77-year-old people have you seen who wake up every morning and adorn themselves with pretty clothes and matching earrings? Shri Lata Chopra does it and not just some days, every single day!

 She once used to be a model, she started acting in films but never finished them. Her father was Mumbai sheriff and later the president of All India Motors. She was a rebel at the core. This became evident when she was being forced to marry a very elder person to her, so she instead married a worker in her father's company, Starline motors.

She says that her rash decision was one of her worst mistakes. The person she married, was a nobody then but a drunkard, Om Prakash Bharti, father of late Divya Bharti. She divorced him. At the age of 21, she already had two kids and she was a divorcee. Her father, who once renounced her accepted her and gave her an apartment to live. For a while, she had big names likes Rajesh Khanna at her apartment but then after leaving the film industry, all contacts were lost. She was a semi-finalist around 1960's for Miss India. 

She cherishes her youth and has only one advice for this generation, "Be a rebel when your parents are completely wrong, but they seldom are". She advises this generation that money is not everything and be aware because it will make you do things you don't want to. She has been a guide, estate broker and even a Frankie seller in her difficult times.

She lives happily in the old age home though she isn't very happy about living there. She believes that you have to accept fate, it will not be the way you want it but accept it and no matter what or where you are, be happy. 

Anita Borkar

We are the generation who shows the way of a tiny, closed nursing home to the ones who showed us the light of the world.

But hardly do we notice the stories that are lurking around that place.

There are two reasons why a person ends up in an old age home.

Either the person's family finds him/her a burden or the person finds his/her family a burden.

Anita is an old woman of the latter category, aged 73 she was tired of being alone at home when everyone else was working or partying. She had lost her husband in a car accident a few years back. She was lonely and sad. She then decided that she wants to leave the house, she requested her family that she wants to live at an old age home that she had found quite interesting. People at the old age home were happy and they lived together. Her family agreed and she shifted.

At one point in time, she had a very productive and amazing life. She was once a personal secretary of Mr. Ratan Tata, she had even worked for Air India. Though she misses her prime days, she loves staying here. She says "I feel home."

She has a relaxing life now. She wakes up early, has breakfast, talks with her friends, reads a newspaper, then takes a bath. She then has lunch with everyone else, after that she either sleeps or talks. In evening she either plays or has activities of her own like watching tv or drawing, etc.

Then she has dinner and again some talking and then she sleeps. Mostly she does talking but that is what all old people love, talking. And that is what keeps them happy. We asked her a question, "What should children do to make their parents happy in their old age?"

She simply said,"Initiate conversations, we just don't want to be alone. We don't want a fancy life or fancy food or lots of money, we just want a simple life but that should be with family"

This story taught us how little things in life, no matter how insignificant, can bring immense joy, only if we tend to look for the happiness.

THE WALK 

I looked up from my laptop screen, disturbed by the incessant human coughing.

Human? Yes, I had become that insensitive to my father. I saw a crooked frame of flesh and bones, just able to support himself on his legs, at my door.

“What happened, dad?” I faked my tone, to sound at least a bit concerned.

“Nothing, I have a bad cough and I am feeling a bit feverish too. Would you get me some medicines?”

Though unwilling, I got up from my bed, on a Sunday morning, to buy medicines for the man I didn’t even care for days.

And yes, it was raining outside. I took my umbrella and went out.

Only I knew how irritated I was. It was raining on a Sunday morning, and here I was, walking on a slippery pavement with an umbrella over my head. He won’t understand ever.

Wait. I just felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me. Was it the rains? Was it the anger?  Or was it my father?

“Mumma, Mumma” I screamed in my sleep, as mom hurriedly woke me up. High fever, coupled with a very bad throat, was a bit too much to take for a 10-year-old, without reacting.

Even in this condition, dad was not there by my side. He was busy with his work, on his laptop, eyes glued to the screen. As I winced in pain, he paused, shot an annoying glance, and started working again. This was the first instance where I felt he didn’t love me.

It was raining quite heavily outside and my fever was constant at 104 degrees. I had to see a doctor immediately.

Dad was visibly upset. He had to leave his laptop, his work, on a Sunday morning, to visit a doctor. Sad, isn’t it?

I remember not talking to him on our way to the doctor’s clinic. He still held my hand protectively, as we both shuffled continuously to be inside that one umbrella.

Soon after our appointment with the doctor, we went to the medicine store. The chemist looked at me and told my father what the problem was and gave us the medicines without even looking at the prescription. The medicines he gave were exactly the medicines prescribed.

When dad questioned him regarding this, the chemist said “Even my son is suffering from high fever and a bad throat. He is at home and my wife is taking care of him. I had to be at the store, that’s why I had to leave him. Work is work. But I make sure it doesn’t get in the way of my parenthood.”

I stopped midway. The chemist’s words echoed in my head.

What if that day, dad had only heard me screaming in my sleep and told my mother to check on me?

What if, he was forced to work on a Sunday morning, against his wish?

What if, he was irritated that he had to work and he was not being able to be by my side?

Amidst all of these thoughts, I reached the same medicine store; I visited with my father 30 years earlier.

A boy, of almost my age, sat at the desk. I told him my father’s age and explained him his condition.

He smiled and gave me some tablets. On being asked why he was smiling, he said “My father is also suffering from high fever and a bad throat. I had to leave him, to attend the store. I just wish I could be with him at home right now. Your father is a lucky man that he has got a son like you, who is there to take care of him, at all times.”

I sighed silently. Was my father seriously lucky?

-Rtr. Tushar Garg